Toddler story from a snow day (no, you can not have your chair)

It’s Wednesday, Feb 18th 2015. It’s been snowing or icy for a couple of days and as such Maggie (our 22 month old,) has been with us nonstop for five days at this point as area schools and daycare shut down if someone drops a slushy in Smyrna.

We’d just come home after a trek to drop mommy off at work as her car was under 2 inches of ice, and snow driving is actually something I’m pretty good at in my front wheel drive Element. It’s pretty simple – go the flattest way possible, don’t get the car going any faster than you’re willing to crash at, stay away from idiots who think 4wd=can drive in snow, and go slow.

This particular run we’d only encountered ice on the street ITmama works on and in the turn lane to our street, so nothing particularly vexing.

I was in charge of Maggie in the morning so Kim could get some work done, and she handled Maggie in the afternoon so I could get what I needed done at my work. It’s one of those times I wonder how people with non-flexible jobs can handle it.

To give outsiders a quick insight into Tennessee school closures, if it gets too cold they’ll shut down a county. Too cold here is under 20. It’s not that we’re wimps about it, it’s that the schools are made for a climate where it rarely gets below 20. As such, too cold = the school cannot heat itself. It’s easier to close for a day or two than spend millions upgrading for something that very rarely happens.

Also this is a state where nobody has snow tires. Why would you buy them if the average use is two days every 12 years? That’s really not an exaggeration.

So everything’s closed. Daycare, schools, anything off a side road is shot because snowplows – seriously, there are very few in operation.

I put Maggie in the snow. It’s not really snow, it’s a bit of snow on top of ice. She takes a few steps and falls down after slipping. Gets what’s going on and goes snow stomping off. She never slipped again during her romp.

Inside I slap on some TV to appease the beast while I get her some food. As she’s sat down to eat I decided to clean out the dishwasher. While doing so I heard a grunting and sounds of extreme frustration from the peanut gallery so I ran in to see what was the matter.

Maggie was attempting to climb into my chair. It’s not that it’s that high up, but it does rock so she’s trying to find solid purchase on a moving object, it’s a pain. She looked at me and I assisted by holding the chair steady.

She got into the chair, plunked down, put both arms as wide as possible and said “mine.” I giggled as my chair had been stolen from me. A minute later she decided I’m guessing to impersonate me or Kim and starting pointing at me saying “no!” “No no no no no no.”

I’m thinking that’s most likely her impersonating Kim as that’s an extra no over what I usually use.

She laughed, I went in and scooped her off the chair. That was about that.

We went out later to pick up Kim and so that I could get to work. Maggie passed out in her winter parka and spent the trip snoring. This trip included a visit to the UPS store, a stop at a Starbucks, a spin by the bank, before finally heading home and me heading out to work.